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Jumat, 23 Juli 2010

WHO'S WHO?

By Mark Edward Nero


Not being able to remember the names of people you meet and know in your personal life can be occasionally awkward. If you seldom see those people, it’s a problem that can be avoided for weeks, months or maybe even years at a time.

But not being able to remember the names of prospective bosses or co-workers – people you either see daily or deal with at least once a week every week – can definitely result in some negative repercussions. That prospective boss is obviously not going to be favorably impressed. As for your co-workers, ducking around corners or scurrying through the office trying to avoid people whose names you can’t remember isn’t a pretty sight. Nor is freezing up like a deer in headlights upon a chance face-to-face meeting with ol’ what’s-his-name.

And if you can never remember the name of a certain person or persons you frequently see in the office, yet they effortlessly remember every minute detail about you, you run the risk of having your colleagues think you’re forgetful, callous or even blatantly disrespectful.

Fortunately, there are simple steps you can take to avoid such scenarios.
First, Be Positive

The very first step is changing a negative way of thinking. We’ve all heard someone say, "I’m bad with names." That’s a no-no, because it’s self-fulfilling. Instead, try a positive approach. Say to yourself, "I’m good with names." That’s a start.

Memory and workplace etiquette experts suggest taking a preventive approach toward the problem. For instance, if you’ve had problems in the past remembering names and are starting a new job, try to get a list of the people in the company before your first day, or at least a roster of those with whom you’ll interact most often. Then study the list so that the names are firmly in your mind. When you have time throughout your first week, review the list and try to put a face to each name. If you want to take it a step further, you can do this four or five times a day, quizzing yourself by starting in the middle, at the end, etc. Each time you practice, you’ll reinforce what you already know while learning new information.

According to Ann Humphries, founder and president of ETICON Inc, a company specializing in etiquette consulting for businesses, if you have a meeting coming up, you should anticipate who’ll be there and make notes. If people give you their business cards, read the cards back to them, Humphries says. Ask for the correct pronunciations of their names and voice it back to them. Then at some point, turn the cards over and jot down information about them, such as their hair color and what they were wearing.

During the meeting, use a legal pad and draw the table. Note who sat where. Then when the next meeting is coming up, do your homework. Take a few seconds before the next meeting and review who does what, Humphries suggests. Use the notes on the business cards you saved. Use the map of the table you drew. It may seem like a lot of work, but it can save you from some potentially embarrassing situations.

Other tricks to help you remember names: making a mental association between the name you heard and the face you’re looking at, rhyming the name with another word or associating the name with that of someone famous.

A clever trick is to use a colleague you know to prompt someone’s self-introduction. As in, "This is Robert, I don’t know if you two have met." The unknown person will then introduce himself or herself to your colleague.
Instant Retention

When it comes to forgetting a name as soon as someone says it to you, you’ve got to concentrate. Be sure you hear it when they say it. Say it right back to them when they tell you. Then use it again quickly. Also, close with a customized end to the conversation if you can. Something like, "Thank you, Susan, good to have met you," means a lot if you can close with the person’s name.

Now, if all your efforts haven’t paid off and you still can’t remember a name or names, the best thing is usually just to say so. Just tell the person you know who they are, but can’t remember their name.

It’s simple, honest and straightforward. And a lot better than ducking behind the water cooler when you see them coming.

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